Preparing for a newborn - Feeding.

A list of items for a newborn in regards to their feeding:

Lansinoh

If you are going to breast feed you will need Lansinoh or something equivalent. It is used to soothe, heal and protect sore cracked nipples and is safe for babies who breast feed. I recommend buying a tube before you go to hospital. You only use a very small amount each time so a small tube is fine. You can find Lansinoh at chemists in the baby items section.

Breast feeding pillow

There are special breast feeding pillows, which I can't comment on because I have never used one. I was given a triangular pillow as a gift and I was very happy with it. What I liked about it is that I could buy spare covers for it. I have 3 covers for the pillow. I don't know if you can buy spare covers for the special breastfeeding pillows or not. I found having the covers was very useful when there were leakages whilst feeding. I could simply whip off the cover, throw it in the wash and replace it with a clean cover.


Flat Cloth Terry Towel Nappies

I bought three packs of flat cloth terry towel nappies.  They were so useful, such as:

1. Between baby and pillow whilst feeding (or use cotton wraps) to catch leakages;
2. To wipe up leakages;
3. Carried in nappy bag to put over change tables whilst out; and
   
4. On change table between baby and change mat at home.

Maternity Bras and Singlets

You need to go to a bra store to be properly fitted for maternity bras.  As for maternity singlets I loved Bonds Bumps Maternity Singlets. I also bought a few cheap singlets in a slightly bigger size and wore them with maternity bras under and a T-shirt over the top, so that the singlets could be pulled down over the bra for feeding and hide my stomach.


Breast Pads

I recommend buying reusable breast pads.  They cost more than disposables but overall they will save you money.  Plus they feel nicer than disposables and are better for the environment.  I love Swaddlebees Organic Velour Breast Pads because they are the biggest ones I could find, so provide better coverage.  They also felt the nicest.  If using disposables I liked Johnson & Johnson breast pads.

 

Breast Pump

At first I used a manual breast pump, which worked well for me but once my flow settled down it was very hard to get any milk out.  Eventually I got an electric breast pump and found I could get a lot more milk with no effort on my part.  An electric pump is a lot more expensive, so you might want to start with a manual first.  However, an electric is a lot easier to use and I do recommend it over a manual pump.

Bottles 

If you do breast feed you might still want bottles so that your baby can be fed expressed milk while you go out.  At one stage Em wouldn't take a bottle at all and I tried Tommy Tippee Closer to Nature and that worked.  Probably because it's shaped more like a breast.  You will also need a bottle brush & steriliser.

Bibs

Having some small bibs was very useful for burping (vomiting). I used to put bibs on Em when driving too because she would often vomit in the car.

Preparing for a newborn - Sleep

A list of items for a newborn baby in regards to their sleep:

Wraps

Wraps help babies sleep better because they are tight and secure (womb like). You'll hopefully learn how to wrap your babies during birth classes or at hospital. You will need at least:
- 3 Flannel wraps
- 3 Cotton wraps
- 3 Muslin wraps

But you might want to get more than three cotton ones. Wraps were also useful for covering up whilst breastfeeding, for using as a travel play mat and for wiping up vomit. I also used them under baby whilst breast feeding to catch nappy leakages. So maybe even 6 or 9 cotton ones would be useful.

I found the smaller sized wraps more useful at first but as Em grew I needed the bigger sizes.

Cot

You can use a cot from birth but I did get a bassinet because I wanted Em in our bedroom and a cot wouldn't have fit. If you buy a second hand cot make sure you get a new mattress. Old mattresses have been linked to SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome).

Bassinet

You don't need a bassinet because you can put a baby in a cot from birth. However, I found it very useful because it is higher up so you are not bending over so much to put baby down for naps (even with the cot on its highest setting you are still bending over a lot and it puts strain on your back!) and it seemed more cosy for Em. I do recommend getting one but it is an extra expense and something you don't need.

Sleep suits

You probably need at least ten sleep suits in size 000 for a newborn but having more than ten sleep suits may be useful. You may have to change your baby a few times a day if their nappy leaks, plus with a newborn it's easiest to just leave them in sleep suits all day. Newborns tend to dislike being dressed and undressed too often.

Singlets

You probably want at least ten singlets in size 000. They can be worn under the sleep suits for extra warmth, or on hot days a nappy and singlet may be enough clothing.

Sheets

Normally you get sheets in a pack with fitted sheet, flat sheet and pillow case, but you can purchase them individually. You don't need the pillow case at all as SIDS guidelines state not to use pillows in cots because of the risk of suffocation. You need a fitted sheet and a flat sheet can be used between a blanket and baby. For a bassinet I used cotton wraps as a flat sheet. You will also need to buy two protective fitted sheets (mattress protector) to save the mattress from leaking nappies.

Blankets

Two blankets are needed (cot and bassinet sized if needed). They can be folded over for extra warmth. On very warm nights I used a cotton or muslin wrap to cover Em.

Sleeping bags

You can buy sleeping bags for newborn babies but I think newborns prefer to be wrapped because it is tighter and more secure. Once they start rolling or getting out of their wraps it's time to think about sleeping bags. I prefer sleeping bags over using sheets and blanket because once Em started moving she was always outside of the covers! With a sleeping bag she stays in her covers where ever she moves.

I'd heard great things about Grobags, so I bought a couple to try, but I found that they are very expensive for no added benefit over cheaper bags (overseas they are a lot cheaper and nothing special. Somehow they became very popular in Australia and the importer made them very expensive so everyone thinks they are best. I like Living Textiles bags, which are the same as Grobags for half the price. I also like Snugtime but they are different to Grobags.

Rocking chair

Great for rocking your baby to sleep. I got mine second hand from Ebay and it was one of the best buys I made. It was so useful when my feet were hurting from pacing around trying to get Em to sleep. I was able to get off my feet in a rocking chair and still be moving. It was also very comfortable for breast feeding Em in, especially in the early days when I was trying to get the hang of it. Plus I still use mine now for reading Em stories in before bed.

Lamp

So you can have softer light in the room and not wake baby (or you) up so much.

Miscarriage.

Unfortunately pregnancy can lead to miscarriage and from my research it's actually very common and most women will experience at least one miscarriage whilst trying to conceive. Most miscarriages happen at the time your next period is due and hence most women think they are having a normal period, rather than a miscarriage, and never notice it.

During the first three months of pregnancy the risk of miscarriage is higher than later, but a miscarriage can happen at any time. I know of one woman who was pregnant around the same time as me and she lost her baby at 8 months! It was such a shock to me that it could still happen that late in pregnancy. Of course it was devastating for her, left her full of grief and wondering if she would ever be able to carry a baby to term. I can't even imagine what she must have gone through - having to birth her stillborn baby girl and then bury her.

I have been pregnant twice now. With my first pregnancy there was something wrong from the start. I didn't get my period but no pregnancy tests showed that I was pregnant. I saw a doctor who told me to wait another week and then she did a blood test which confirmed my pregnancy but also showed that there were very low hormone levels.

I knew I was pregnant and became attached to the baby in my belly. A couple of weeks later I started bleeding and it continued for a month. I was devastated. It was very early on. I must have only been about 6 weeks, but I was still so sad. What I found even worse was that no one knew about my pregnancy or miscarriage and I suffered alone. I had to grieve the loss and it left me wondering if I'd be able to carry a baby to term. I realise that it must not have been a viable embryo but I still felt like I had lost a baby.

As soon as I found out I was pregnant a second time I told my closest family and friends. I didn't want to be alone again if I miscarried again.

If you have been effected by miscarriage and you are struggling with the loss seek help by talking to family, friends or a counsellor. The grief is real. The loss is real.

Choosing a birth place.

1) Private hospital

Pros :

• You choose a private caregiver who looks after you for your entire pregnancy
• Private hospitals generally have good facilities
• You have your own private room
• Your partner can stay the night
• You have help 24 hours a day while you stay in hospital

Cons:

• It is more costly, even with private health insurance you will still be out of pocket
• Statistics have shown that more medical intervention (e.g. caesarians) occur in private hospitals than they do in the public health system
• There are no facilities to deal with very premature babies so you will be moved to a public hospital if that situation arises

2) Public hospital

Pros:

• It's free
• Statistics have shown that less medical intervention occurs at public hospitals
  
• A lot of public hospitals have great facilities now with birth centres fully equipped with things like baths, fit balls, etc and mid-wives rather than obstetricians
• Public hospitals are better able to deal with unusual emergencies
• You have help 24 hours a day while you stay in hospital
  

Cons:

• You will see a different caregiver every time you attend a check up
• There are no private rooms
• Partners cannot stay the night

3) Home birth

Pros:

• No medical intervention - all natural birth
• You can choose to birth in a birth pool (hospitals will not allow you to give birth in a bath)
• You choose your midwife and they look after all your prenatal care and birth
• You birth within the comfort of your own home with whoever you want present

Cons:

• If a medical emergency occurs you need to get to a hospital
• It is costly
• You don't have immediate help on hand directly after the birth but you can contact your chosen mid-wife for advice

My Choice

I chose to go with a private obstetrician for my prenatal and birth care because I wanted one caregiver throughout my pregnancy and I had good private health cover. I found an obstetrician whose clinic had three other obstetricians who all shared the care of each other's patients. Throughout my pregnancy I had appointments to meet each obstetrician so that if my doctor wasn't available at the time of birth I would already know the other doctors, one of whom would be present. I chose a female obstetrician (and the other doctors were all female too) because I wanted my doctor to understand what I was going through and what birth was actually like.

I also liked the private hospital I went to which had birthing suites with huge spa baths, showers, fit balls, big comfortable beds which could be converted into birthing stools, plus more. The rooms looked more like a nice hotel room than a birthing room. Unfortunately I didn't get a chance to use a birthing suite due to Em being in the breech position.

Also my private hospital was within a public hospital, which was important to my husband. It meant that if there was a big emergency I would be rushed a couple of floors away, rather than having to spend time in transit to another hospital. (Just before I fell pregnant there was a case of a woman dying after labour because of the time it took to transport her to a public hospital, hence why it was particularly important to my husband. It also means that if your baby needs special care they can be also be transported a couple of floors away, rather than to another hospital).

My final reason for going private was so that I would have my own private room (I am a light sleeper and I knew I would need my sleep) and so that my husband could stay the night. My husband being able to stay the night turned out to be very much needed when I was very sick for the first two days after birth and I couldn't get up to our daughter at all. He did all the nappy changes and brought her to me for feeding. Again the room was more like a hotel room than a hospital and we had a double bed to share. The staff were very helpful and there was a breast feeding room available during the day for women to go to for help from lactation consultants. Overall, I was very happy with my choice of hospital.

Preventing Whooping Cough in babies.

Whooping cough (pertussis) is a serious, contagious respiratory infection, which can affect anyone but is particularly dangerous for babies. It is recommended that women planning on becoming pregnant receive a booster dose of the vaccine a few months prior to becoming pregnant, or the vaccine can be given soon after the birth of the baby. Fathers should also have the vaccine prior to the baby's birth. This protects the baby during their first few months of life when the illness is most serious for babies and when parents are the primary people in contact with the baby.

You can read more here.

Recommended Baby Books.

I highly recommend "Baby Love" by Robin Barker. Robin is an experienced nurse, midwife and early childhood nurse as well as a mother and grandmother. The book is easy to read and full of helpful advice and information on sleeping, crying, breastfeeding, nutrition, illnesses and growth and development. It also has a section of recipes for babies and it is Australian so it has Australian specific resources.

Another book I highly recommend is "The Wonder Weeks" by Hetty Vanderijt and Frans Plooij. The Wonder Weeks is about the eight major developmental leaps that babies make within their first 14 months. It covers how to help your baby through these fussy periods, what they go through during this time and what the developmental leaps are. It also covers which games and toys are best for babies at different ages and stages. This book was hugely valuable to me. It was good to understand what Em was going through at different times and also to know what sorts of games and toys would suit her best at the different stages. As a new mother I often found myself wondering "what's going on now" and this book helped me to understand why Em was doing what she was doing and what she was trying to learn. I also found myself not knowing what games or toys to introduce and when. Again this book helped me to know when the best times to introduce different games and toys were. I really can't recommend this book highly enough. I think every new mother should have a copy. The only problem I found is that it is not available in book shops. Perhaps you can ask for it to be ordered in? I found it easiest and cheapest to search online. The book typically retails for about $50 in Australia but if you search around you can find it for around $30. It is also available in libraries and that's how I first stumbled across it.

Back ache.

During the second trimester my back started aching, especially towards the end of the day. Then during the third trimester my back got worse and worse and got to a point where it was hurting all day long. I couldn't get comfortable. It also affected my sleep. By the end of the day I was in agony. I'm not sure if it was because my baby was big or because she was in breech or just because.

What helped me was:

• Doing a course through my hospital, run by a physiotherapist, about managing your back, pelvic floor and other pregnancy issues. If your hospital doesn't run such a course I would recommend seeing a physiotherapist who specialises in women's health. You will be given exercises to do at home, which did help relieve my back ache. You will also be given information on how to sit, stand and lie so that you are in the best position to prevent aches. The course also covered birth and the best positions to use to relieve pain.
  
• Doing the stretches given to you by the physiotherapist every day.
  
• Using lots of pillows in bed to support your legs and growing belly. I also used pillows when sitting on the couch and in the car to support my back into a more comfortable position.
• Seeing an osteopath regularly to manipulate and massage the back to relieve pressure.
• Getting regular massage to relieve muscle soreness.
• Sitting on a chair backwards so that you are leaning on the back of the chair. This really worked well to relieve back ache and was very comfortable.
• Walking regularly.
  

Carpal tunnel.

I suffered from carpal tunnel during my pregnancy (pains and numbness in my hands). Unfortunately there's not much you can do about it. I found massage, physiotherapy and wearing a wrist and hand splint eased my hand pain but never got rid of it altogether and by the end of the day my hands were much sorer and more tingly. Towards the end of pregnancy it was a lot worse and during the last month my hands were pretty much unusable because of the shooting, stabbing pains and pins and needles.

At the same (weird) time (because I just have to do things differently to everyone) I experienced the same pains and pins and needles in my knees and feet. It got to a point where I couldn't kneel down or bend my knees much at all. Walking hurt too.

I was actually told that my hands, feet and knees weren't carpal tunnel by my obstetrician but she couldn't offer me any other explanation, except to say 'that's very weird'.

Yes my pregnancy was filled with weird aches and pains. Then I had a c-section which made my feet swell to twice their size (seriously) and it made the pain and numbness in my feet even worse.

To this day, one year after the birth of Em, I am still suffering from pins and needles in my thumbs, knees and my feet, but thankfully the pain has gone. The only explanation I have been given is that it is probably nerve dampening caused by all the swelling in my pregnancy and c-section and nerves take a very, very long time to heal.

I do feel very unusual in these symptoms and am yet to find another women who has experienced this in their hands, knees and feet.

As I said I do like to be different.

Why breastfeed?

There are so many reasons why every woman should breastfeed her baby. (Of course there are some women who can't because of medical reasons and my intention is not to make you feel guilty if you fall into that category.)

So here are some of the reasons for breastfeeding.

• There is absolutely NO substitute for breastfeeding. Breast milk contains all the nutrients and anti-bodies designed and required by human babies. It contains immunities to diseases and aids in the development of the baby's immune system. Formula does not and is NOT a substitute. Breast milk is the PERFECT food for human babies.
• Breastfeeding decreases a baby's chance of ear infections, diarrhoeal infections, respiratory infection, allergies & asthma + lots more. Breastfed babies are generally healthier than formula fed babies.
  
• Breastfeeding helps bonding between baby and mother, which helps with the emotional growth of the baby.
• Breast milk is FREE.
• Breast milk changes in taste depending on what the mother eats so baby is exposed to many different tastes. Formula tastes the same every time.
  
• Breast milk is easier to digest than formula.
  
• Breast milk is always ready and at the perfect temperature. No bottles to wash and sterilise. No need to pack bottles when going out.
  
• Breastfeeding produces no waste.
  
• Breastfeeding aids the mother's recovery after birth by shrinking the uterus quickly to it's pre-pregnancy size and helps to prevent post-partum haemorrhaging.
• Breastfeeding helps the mother lose weight after birth.
  
• Breastfeeding decreases a mother's chance of breast cancer.
• It is natural and it is what the breasts were designed for.
  

Preparing for breast feeding.

To prepare for breast feeding I recommend reading books or chapters on breast feeding. In particular I recommend the books Birth: Conceiving, Nurturing and Giving Birth to your Baby by Catherine Price and Sandra Robinson and Baby Love by Robin Barker for their comprehensive information. There are also courses on breast feeding, which will be run by your hospital and you can get great information from the ABA (Australian Breastfeeding Association).

To be honest at the time when I was reading and learning about breast feeding I found it frustrating because I often didn't really understand what they meant. It seemed pointless to be learning about something that you cannot practice. However, once my baby arrived I realised how useful it was to know everything I knew about breast feeding. Sure, I still didn't know how to actually do it but I knew:

• It would be difficult;
• It would be painful to begin with;
• To begin with I would be feeding 8 to 12 times a day;
• A feed would take an hour to begin with;
  
• The sorts of problems that could arise and how to deal with them;
• About the existence of lactation consultants who could help with any problems that arose;
  
• There would be temporary periods of time when the baby would feed longer and more often and they were periods of growth;
• The more milk a baby takes the more you make; and
  
• There is plenty of help out there for mothers - lactation consultants, health centre nurses, ABA, drop in clinics, etc and having a supportive partner and family is also important.
  

Armed with this information I think is part of the key to success. If you enter breast feeding expecting it to be a lot of hard work but definitely achievable and knowing that there is actually plenty of help out there then you are much more likely to succeed. A lot of women incorrectly believe they don't have a big enough supply when their baby starts feeding more often, when in fact it is a temporary period of time to increase your supply.

Of course sometimes breast feeding doesn't work out even after you have put your best effort in but I also think a lot of women give up perhaps because they didn't expect it to be such hard work.